Call your girlfriend(s) π
Hi friend,
how are you holding up? There is so much to say about these last two weeks, so many serious topics that could be covered. But I'm exhausted from working in the news industry, I don't sleep much (or well) and the one thing that is keeping me going are my friendships. So let's focus on the light in these dark times.
Because in the midst of this catastrophic situation, I wholeheartedly believe that friendships are coming out on top. Families are under a lot of stress, romantic relationships are being put to the test, but friendships are only growing stronger.
I don't know about you, but I communicate a lot more with my friends now than I did before self-isolation. Via text, phone and zoom calls. Not because we cannot go out and are bored at home. This kind of communication feels much more profound, like we're sincerely looking out for each other, checking in, carrying each other through this crisis. Having meaningful conversations has never been easier because we all start from the same emotional baseline β which sits somewhere between despair, anxiety and timid optimism, depending on the day.
Now is the time that you realize who your true ride-or-dies are (and who is not). The ones who text you everyday. The ones who send you funny memes to make your day more cheerful. The ones who organize group calls. The ones who share plant care hacks β because they know you. These are the ones to hold on to after this crisis and never let go. These people are on your apocalypse team. And the most beautiful thing about all of this is that location really doesn't matter anymore. All my friendships are equal now because they all live in the virtual space.
However, the closer I get to my friends on our various media channels, the more I miss physical closeness. I miss being touched. But not sexually. I miss being able to hug my friends, I miss being hugged, being held. I wish I could give myself hugs like I can get myself off. And I envy everyone who has a dog, cat or pony as designated cuddle buddy right now.
Ultimately, I hope that these weeks and months in isolation will help lift the taboo on loneliness. I mean, everyone can sympathize now, right? Everyone has now experienced how devastating it feels to yearn for human connection. And I hope that one of the things we learn from this is to take better care of the people around us who we know spend a lot of time by themselves. And that it's ok to reach out when you feel lonely β and say exactly that.
β€οΈ The magnificent Elizabeth Gilbert has turned into something like my life guru ever since I re-watched "Eat Pray Love" on the plane in January. I found an interview with her on the Lit Up Podcast a couple of weeks ago which is so full of wisdom that I actually wrote down some notes and quotes from it. Like:
1) On women going after what they want and what makes them feel satisfied:
"If culture as we know it is to continue, we need women to not want more. But the reality is that there is a growling hunger in me and in every woman I know and it has a voice and it says mooore!"
2) On forgiveness and how nobody has the right to be forgiven. You get to ask for it once and then you have to let go and accept it if the other person says "no, you have hurt me too badly":
"If you're playing checkers, would you be allowed to make four moves in a row? No. You're allowed to make one. So if you make a move, and they don't, then the game is over. Stop going back in. You're cheating at the game. Leave them alone."
3) And then, what else could it be, she talks beautifully about how female friendships are the real love stories of our lives. In her year of turning 50, she celebrated by taking each of her closest friend on a trip that the respective friend would love and, um, #lifegoals?!
βοΈ I'm a bit low on #popculturepleasures right now, because I have been working the longest days. Two things though:
I have been excessively listening back to Maggie Rogers, who was with me during my accidental self-isolation in Portugal last year. I had planned for a month of surf, work and hike, only to slice open my foot on day one, having to spend the rest of the time idly staring out onto the ocean. I learned a lot during these quiet days and Maggie reminds me of these lessons. Also, her iconic Light On video will always trigger a healthy cathartic cry.
My current literature of choice are young adult novels. After finishing Turtles All The Way Down, I dove right into the next John Green book. Paper Towns is just as wonderfully written and takes me back into a universe full of dreams, thirst for life and makes me nostalgic for my senior year in the American Midwest. A time when my biggest worries circled around who would be my date for the Homecoming dance (his name was Luke, he was cute, he was cool, and he was charged for a felony shortly after the dance. So yes, I have always had great taste in men).
π©πͺ Zum Ende mΓΆchte ich noch einen kleinen Werbeblock in eigener Sache einbauen:
FΓΌr meinen Arbeitgeber produziere ich momentan den Podcast "Coronaland β Zwischen Krise und Perspektive". Mein Kollege Mark und ich sprechen zwei mal pro Woche ΓΌber alles, was sich durch die Coronakrise so verΓ€ndert β und ich glaube da werden uns die Themen nicht so schnell ausgehen. Ich habe ΓΌberraschend viel SpaΓ an der Arbeit vorm Mikro und am Schnittrechner und freue mich, wenn ihr mal reinhΓΆrt.
FΓΌr Im Gegenteil habe ich ein weiteres Single Portrait geschrieben und diesen Mann sollten wir ja wohl vermittelt kriegen, oder Ladies?
Alright, I'm sending you the biggest virtual hug and will talk to you again in two weeks. Stay healthy, stay sane and keep reaching out to your friends.
All the best,
Anna