I have officially reached the age of misery
Hi friend,
I hope you had great start into the new decade! Made any resolutions? Kept any?
🌴 As you might remember, I vowed to do absolutely nothing productive while being tucked away in a beachside hammock for three weeks and I'm happy to report: mission accomplished! In between sunrise surf sessions, sweaty yoga classes and walking up a few (ok, two) hills, I did a whole lot of idly staring out into the ocean, fresh coconut on hand.
However, not having been productive does not mean I did not meet inspiring people, had thought-provoking conversations or read interesting books and essays. So today's newsletter is a loose collection of all things that made me think, smile or cry while on holiday. Grab a coconut and let's dive in!
I spent my vacation in Sri Lanka, which is a beautiful country, but also a country in which women are not allowed to take part in public life (in most places that is, it seems to be changing in the capital Colombo already). Instead, women are expected to take care of the household, leaving them forever dependent on their fathers or husbands. This obvious lack of women in the public sphere made me brutally aware of my own privilege to move freely in this world, to do whatever I please and surf at every beach where the waves are not out to kill me. It also made me all the more conscious of how much work we still have to do in order to achieve true equality.
Luckily, there are already various initiatives around Sri Lanka which are getting to work and helping women move beyond the domestic. One of them is the Arugam Bay Surf Club, Sri Lankas first all-female surf club. I have shared this article before, but it does not get old. It tells the story of the backlash that the Australian initiator faced at first ("if she really wanted to help, she should buy the women sewing machines") and how the sport and the club empowers local women today.
While I was staying at the south coast, I helped out with the Surf Kids Club Meddawatta, an organization which teaches local kids to surf and swim. Everybody is welcome to volunteer at their Sunday sessions and I cannot recommend it enough! They do not only teach the kids to swim and surf, the kids also improve their English, learn how to communicate with foreigners and the boys are understanding that girls also have a place in the line up. And it's fun!
I also happened to celebrate my birthday under palm trees. I turned 31 and have now officially entered "the age of misery"– at least according to Guardian editor Bridie Jabour. Yay! At first I was quite offended by the headline of her opinion piece, as I really didn't feel THAT miserable, but after hearing her out I have to admit that she has a point or two.
"Everyone seemed to sail through 30, but 31 has been the mental block. Maybe we won’t be rich. Maybe we won’t be famous. Maybe this job is the “career” we thought was waiting for us around the corner. Is a big love coming? Are our parents really going to die?"
Jabour basically sees the age of 31 as our one, big reality-check. While everything seemed possible in our 20s, we are slowly and quietly burying dreams of being young and famous, realizing that we're maybe not so special after all, and instead hear the ominous clock ticking for the first time.
I have only been 31 for a little over a week now and am feeling okay – but I have indeed been seeing the big "Is this really it?" question waving from afar for a while (even at 30, which I most certainly didn't "sail through", ugh). I'll keep you posted on my level of misery.
Alright, now on to #popculturepleasures, holiday edition:
📚 My favorite beach read was by far "Not Forgetting The Whale", by John Ironmonger. It's the story of a city analyst who saves a remote village in Cornwall from the apocalypse and finds a home and community in the process. While reading it I learned a lot about the messy interdependency of global supply chains, how the flu virus has the potential to wipe out humanity faster than you can say climate change (which feels eerie now with Corona on the horizon), but I also learned to have faith in the goodness of people. Reviewers have called it a "heart warming dystopia" and that's the most accurate description there is. Read it! It's moving and educational and entertaining and that combination is so incredibly hard to come by.
📺 The opposite of heart warming, yet out of this world captivating, is the mini series Sharp Objects which I watched on the plane. The series is based on the book by Gillian Flynn, who is also responsible for the equally disturbing "Gone Girl". There's nothing uplifting about the story, on the contrary, it leaves you pretty haunted and shaken up, but the brilliant screenplay and outstanding cast make it impossible to look away.
🎧 Back to uplifting we go with Andrew Scott's appearance on "How to Fail", my second favorite podcast in the world. I listened to the episode while confined to my hostel bed with a case of Sri Lankan belly (spare you the details) and I swear, this conversation made me physically better – such a fun interview! Andrew Scott is witty, thoughtful, charming, sincere and I totally agree with Elizabeth Day: he's the perfect man. And gay. Oh well. Lucky men, I suppose.
🤓 My wonderful travel companion Marlene threw "The Book of Beautiful Business" into my hands when I had run out of reading material and I have since recommended it to several more people (and now to you!). It's an inspiring, at times provocative essay collection on how we can humanize business in a world which has set out to optimize, scale and streamline everything to death. Great read for everyone who is tired of "old work" and hamster wheels.
✈️ Confession: I'm a very anxious flyer. This is a recent development after I experienced a bout of severe turbulences two years ago, so I'm still learning how to manage my fear and stay calm when the plane hits rough patches. What has been helping me a little was this Instagram post, which offers several new-ish coping strategies. I particularly like the idea of having a chat with your feelings and offering them wine and a TV show as a distraction. Do you have any tips?
Congratulations, you have made it to the end of the newsletter equivalent of a full evening's worth of looking at vacation pictures and I thank you for your time and patience.
Much love and til next week,
Anna